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Bird 02 Entertainment Web3

Roast Me for a Dollar

A live one-dollar comedy roast site with its own robot host. People pay a dollar, Roasty roasts them live on camera, and they walk away with a vertical video made to share. It is built, running, and ready to hand over.

Pre-revenue and launch-stage. Live and tested end to end on desktop and mobile.

$1,495
One payment. You take the keys.
Book a Bird Call See Roasty live

This button sends a keys request, not a charge. We write back first, then you settle the $1,495 through Wise, bank transfer, or on-chain payment in ETH, USDC, or another coin we agree on. Nothing moves until that is done. You get a private payment request once we agree. There is no checkout on this page.

What it is

Phase 0 of 4

This is only Phase 0. People roast themselves or their own pet, never someone else, and everyone opts in for a one-dollar comedy roast. Each drop is a vertical video with Roasty as host, the same character every time, so the brand feels steady even when every roast is new. What you get today is the working base, including the live site, the full roast flow, the video pipeline, and web3 rails that are already built and devnet-tested.

The roadmap is where it gets loud, with Roasty's lore and character arc, community roast nights, NFT drops, and spin-offs. Phase 0 is the spark and the buyer decides how big the fire gets. The product is Instagram-first so the videos can feed the brand channel.

See Roasty live

These are real posts on the brand channels, the same Roasty people see after they pay a dollar on the site.

How it works

Customer track

Take a selfieSelf-roasts only. Take, keep, or retake in the booth, then check the consent box for you or your pet. No roasting other people.
Pay $1Stripe hosted checkout opens in a popup over the living room scene. Card only, and the URL stays on roastmeforadollar.com.
Warm-upThey see queue position, an ETA, and the “ROAST WARMING UP” scene while Roasty gets ready.
Roasty generates the videoAI roast copy, robot voice, and the puppet host with mouth flap, blinks, and captions.
Drop page and emailThey watch, download, and share with #roastedbyroasty. The care-path email includes a keepable link when that path runs.

Your day to day (Phase 0)

What you actually do to run the bird while the site handles the roast flow. The Nest is your back room, not the whole job.

Morning in the NestSkim orders, queue health, failed checkouts, and anything stuck. Glance at the cron worker and care-path signups so renders keep moving. Catch problems before a customer emails hello@.
Customer supportReply from hello@ or support@ when someone needs a re-send, a refund review, or help with consent. Threads stay in the Nest.
Social and contentPost roasts with permission, watch Instagram and TikTok, and keep #roastedbyroasty in play. Phase 0 is mostly you feeding the channels.
Numbers and learningCheck GA4 for checkout and purchase events. No invented targets, just see what is landing and adjust your posts.
Ops rhythmFollow the SOP and the 3, 6, and 12 month growth plan in Nest so daily ops, marketing ideas, and engineering asks stay in separate lanes.
Drop storageRendered tapes on the server rotate after about 24 hours on the drop path. Plan extra storage or a CDN if you want a permanent public gallery.

Demo links

What comes with the bird

  • Domain roastmeforadollar.com
    Spaceship
    Live
    Registrar push to buyer Spaceship account.
  • Full codebase
    Site + Nest + worker
    Live
    Private repo or zip at handoff.
  • Hosting setup
    Spaceship shared
    Live
    You may move hosts. SOP included.
  • Roasty puppet + animation files
    assets/roasty
    Live
    Scene kits, mouth/blink plates, training pack, Blender pack at handoff.
  • Brand art
    Hero, og, IG avatar, TikTok art, GIFs
    Live
    Ships with source.
  • Stripe setup + handoff
    Dedicated account
    Live
    $1 product, webhook, live mode. Transfer or buyer keys.
  • Nest admin
    /nest
    Live
    Login reset at handoff.
  • Email hello@ + support@
    Spacemail
    Live
    Mailbox handoff with domain.
  • Web3 module
    Solana / Metaplex Core + Privy
    Live
    Codebase with devnet-tested paths and a documented mainnet switch.
  • Prompts + copy
    Site + Nest
    Live
    Roast house voice, captions, care emails.
  • Instagram @roastmeforadollar
    instagram.com/roastmeforadollar
    Live
    Fresh brand Creator account that transfers with email. No follower counts on this listing.
  • TikTok @roastmeforadollar
    tiktok.com/@roastmeforadollar
    Live
    Fresh brand account that transfers with email. No follower counts on this listing.
  • Dedicated US phone line
    eSIM (social verification)
    Live
    Transfers to buyer. Number and PIN never appear on this listing.
  • GA4
    Nest-injected
    Live
    Property access transfer.
  • SOP + growth plan
    /nest
    Live
    Daily ops and 3 / 6 / 12 plan.

Web3-ready

Solana NFT minting is built in with Metaplex Core, plus Privy wallet login and a claim flow in the codebase. Paths are devnet-tested and a mainnet switch is ready when you are. A buyer can launch a Roasty collection or offer claimable roast NFTs. Nothing here is described as live on mainnet or as a launched collection until you wire mainnet and finish the wallet step on the claim page.

Roasty's road from $1 roasts to a community

Phase 0 is what exists today. Phases 1 through 4 are the plan for the next owner, not promises.

  1. Phase 0 · Now (live)

    • $1 self-roasts live on roastmeforadollar.com with selfie, consent, Stripe popup, Roasty video drop, and a shareable link.
    • Roasty, the animated host, delivers every roast.
    • Instagram and TikTok @roastmeforadollar live with the first roast videos posted.
    • Solana NFT minting (Metaplex Core) and Privy wallet login built into the codebase, devnet-tested.

  2. Phase 1 · Make Roasty a character Plan

    • Give Roasty a name card, backstory, and lore as a burned-out comedy robot who works the night shift roasting the internet one dollar at a time.
    • Seasonal outfit drops such as Halloween ghost Roasty, holiday Roasty, and Vegas lounge Roasty.
    • Signature catchphrases and a recurring sign-off so fans recognize the voice.
    • Weekly "Roast of the Week" post on IG and TikTok, with the subject's permission.

  3. Phase 2 · Grow the crowd Plan

    • A #roastedbyroasty share loop where every drop page invites a share and a “roast a friend who asked for it” referral link.
    • Pet roasts for cats and dogs submitted by the owner, the most shareable format.
    • Duet and stitch challenges on TikTok like “Can you survive Roasty?”
    • Creator collabs where micro-creators get a free roast to post and their fans get a code.
    • Leaderboard of the best-sport roastees (opt-in).

  4. Phase 3 · Web3 layer Plan

    The code is built. This is the launch plan.

    • Finish the wallet step on the claim page and flip the mainnet switch.
    • “Keep your roast” so roastees can claim their roast as a collectible NFT.
    • The first Roasty collection as a limited genesis drop of skins and lore cards.
    • Holders get perks such as free roasts, early skins, a vote on Roasty's next outfit, and a spot in the Roast Hall of Fame.
    • Launch $ROASTY, a Solana community token for holder perks, roast credits, or tip loops (tokenomics and compliance up to the buyer).
    • NFT collection URL is TBD.

  5. Phase 4 · Community and spin-offs Plan

    • A Discord or Telegram "Roast Pit" for holders and regulars, with live roast nights.
    • Holder-voted lore chapters where the community decides what happens to Roasty next.
    • Merch like Roasty stickers, shirts, and enamel pins.
    • Brand and event roasts (birthdays, bachelor parties, team offsites) as a premium tier.
    • Optionally license Roasty as a character for streamers or apps.

This roadmap is a plan for the next owner, not a promise. Phase 0 is what exists today.

Tech stack

Vanilla JS (site.js and experience.css), PHP Nest, SQLite on the server with MySQL supported, ffmpeg CPU compose, mespeak.js TTS in the browser tape path plus server render, LLM roast text through a provider you configure in Nest (key not in repo), Stripe Checkout Embedded, Spacemail SMTP, GA4, a Spaceship cron worker, and Solana Metaplex Core with Privy (partial).

Running costs

Confirm sources at handoff.

ItemNotes
DomainSpaceship renewal (confirm at handoff)
PhoneTello eSIM for social verification (confirm plan at handoff)
HostingShared Essential nursery plan today. You may move.
Stripe per $1 roastPer your dedicated account pricing at handoff
LLM / TTSMetered per roast from provider in Nest settings
GA4 + SpacemailIncluded with plan
Web3 RPC / pinningConfirm at handoff if used on mainnet

What works on day one

Live site and $1 pathroastmeforadollar.com with selfie booth, consent, Stripe, warm-up, and drop.
Roasty pipelineQueue, worker, captions, share board.
NestOrders, queue, mail, settings, SOP, growth plan.
Mail and analyticshello@ care path and GA4 events.
Instagram and TikTok@roastmeforadollar brand accounts.

What you finish after purchase

Hosting moveFTP, cron, worker key on your host.
StripeAccount transfer or your keys and webhook.
GA4 and social loginsAttach your Google user, IG email, and phone line.
Legal entityUse Nest Settings and Legal to fill Terms and Privacy on the live site.
Flags you wantGallery, auto-post, web3 mainnet arming.

Straight talk

  • Status. Pre-revenue and launch-stage. Live and tested end to end on desktop and mobile.
  • Money path. The $1 Stripe checkout on roastmeforadollar.com is wired and tested.
  • Gallery. Built and switched off on purpose.
  • Queue. Shared hosting runs one render at a time. Long waits move to the email care path.
  • Web3-ready. Metaplex Core and Privy live in code and are devnet-tested. Mainnet switch and the claim-page wallet step remain for the buyer.
  • Legal. Terms and Privacy may show handoff placeholders until you set entity, jurisdiction, and support email in Nest.

Hard questions

Any revenue yet?

Pre-revenue and launch-stage. The product is live and tested end to end. There is no outside customer revenue to report.

Can people roast someone else?

No. Self-roasts and your own pet only. Consent and copy enforce that.

What about pets?

Allowed with the adult gate after keep. Still no roasting other people.

What if many people pay at once?

FIFO queue with concurrency of one. ETA is shown. After about five minutes they can leave email for a ready ping from hello@.

Who owns Stripe and customer data?

The dedicated Stripe account transfers or the buyer re-attaches keys. Customer emails live in Nest and mail threads.

Is the web3 part really built?

Yes in code. Metaplex Core minting, Privy login, and the claim flow are devnet-tested with a mainnet switch ready. It is not claimed as live on mainnet or as a launched collection until you finish the claim-page wallet step and deploy mainnet.

What do I finish after I buy?

Hosting, Stripe, GA4, social logins, phone line, legal fields, and any flags you want such as gallery, auto-post, or web3.

Can I try it first?

Yes. Pay $1 on the live site or book a bird-call.

What happens when you buy

1 · Request the keysName and email, no card. This button does not charge. The bird stays on the shelf until we both agree.
2 · We write back and settle the $1,495You are buying the bird outright, not a monthly seat. Settlement is through Wise, bank transfer, or on-chain, usually ETH or USDC, and we can agree on another coin. After we agree, you get a private payment request. Then domain, Nest, and source transfer.
3 · Handoff afternoonDomain, Nest owner account, source, and hosting move while we are on the call. Stripe, mail, GA4, Instagram, TikTok, and phone line handoffs as named on this listing. You fill Nest Settings and Legal so Terms and Privacy name your entity. Roasty source and Blender pack walkthrough.
4 · You fly itAttach your Stripe keys if needed, turn on gallery or web3 when you are ready, and post on the channels. Revenue is still zero until you earn it. No P&L is included.

Handoff afternoon checklist

  • Domain push
  • Source / repo access
  • Hosting move (FTP + cron + worker key)
  • Nest login reset
  • Stripe account transfer or buyer keys + webhook
  • Spacemail mailboxes
  • GA4 property access
  • Instagram login + email + phone line
  • TikTok if you keep it
  • Phone port or eSIM handoff
  • Web3 contract ownership / authority keys (Nest only, never on this page)
  • Roasty source + Blender pack walkthrough
  • SOP + legal entity in Nest
After you buy · supportIncluded means 2 hours post-sale help on the sale, handoff extras, light edits, and walkthrough beyond the afternoon. After that is $50/hr for marketing, custom edits, features, or hand-holding. Production bugs in what was sold are free for 30 days after handoff, such as a broken pay path, a stuck queue, or brand scrape breaking the site. New features, campaigns, and “make it look like X” are not free.
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Who this is for

A creator, comedian, meme page, or small studio that wants a running character-led content engine.

Who this is not for

Anyone who needs a proven P&L, passive income claims, or roasts of other people without their consent.